The word empathy creates confusion with some as it is often linked with or used in conjunction with sympathy.  These two are very different as they are experienced by someone going through a tough time or when trying to explain to their spouse what is bothering them. 

For most children the end of the year is usually a time of great excitement and joy, lots of gifts and treats, visits with extended family and family friends, lots of fun things to do, and unfortunately, more frequent tantrums and other challenging behaviors. 

The holidays are a difficult time of year for so many of us. Thanksgiving, in particular, can be especially hard for some. For instance, how can one be “thankful” when there are so many reasons to feel the sting of loss? If being together for Thanksgiving feels more like a time to grieve than a time to be thankful, what is one supposed to do?

One of the struggles the mental health field has struggled with was accessibility to those who need services. With social media, millions of people can access 2+ years of graduate work in 60 seconds without, sometimes, having to see a professional. In a way, this has created a watered-down effect on mental health because we hear things like this:

Have you ever heard someone say “My child is giving me such a hard time” or even better, has one of your own parents ever told you that you used to “give them a hard time”? In the parent/child relationship, it is important to remember and respect that both the parent and child have needs. As parents, we are called to discipline our children and teach them the way they should go. However, through the younger years, they are very much also growing in such a way that at times they are still not even capable of reaching some of our unrealistic expectations.

My goal as a counselor is to help adults, adolescents, and children by providing a space to be heard, process life’s challenges, and develop the necessary skills to thrive mentally, physically, and spiritually. My overall approach to therapy involves cognitive behavioral methods (exploring one’s thoughts and beliefs relative to emotions and behaviors), as well as narrative therapy (engaging personal stories that view people as separate from their problems). I view counseling as a collaborative effort in helping clients to recognize strengths, identify needs, understand conflicts, discover new options, set personal development goals, and make informed choices.

To this day, I can see and hear kids making fun of me in the halls of my middle school. I was a scrawny kid, who had rapidly lost weight after treatment had started. Stretch marks remain to this day along the sides of my thighs. My head was completely bald due to the chemotherapy. I was given permission to wear a baseball cap to school. Walking up the stairs was hard. They let me take the elevator up.

I have written in previous blogs regarding the phrase, “I love you, but I’m not in love with you.” Unfortunately, this is often said when not fully understanding what love is or what being in love means. Regardless of what you want to call it, we can at least take a look at what is happening within the relationship and how to get it moving in the direction where positive feelings are starting to increase. This blog will briefly discuss love and being in love, then a little about how we lose it – and everyone does – followed by how to start getting it back although it will be a little different.

I often hear parents say: “We have tried everything, yet nothing seems to be working!” during that first initial intake appointment. Maybe you are sitting at home, your child has finally fallen asleep after .. not one.. not two… but seven attempts, the living room is a mess, you have not had time to box up the leftovers from dinner, while desperately trying to find ways to help your child.